I wish everything was black and white.

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I was a regular college student. College was supposed to be predictable, challenging yet carefree, “the best four years of my life.” All of that came to a screeching halt. After suddenly losing a friend to suicide, my world turned upside down. I didn’t know what to feel. I felt nothing and I felt everything. I wanted my thoughts to be clear: black and white. But no.

It was all just grey.

Grey Thoughts is an honest retelling of my college experience, the decline of my mental health during my grief, and my efforts to find something to live for.